Consumers in uproar upon discovering Spring Mix is now only double washed

The lettuce industry was riding a wave of popularity unmatched by those of other leaves.  Their boasts of triple washes, however, has now come to an end. With increased interest in “root” vegetables, the industry has had to fight back, after losing share to carrots, rootabagas, and radishes. “We simply do not have the resources to wash our lettuce three times,” an industry spokesperson, Clive Endive, reported. “And besides, do you wash YOUR lettuce more than once, those rare times when you get off your a** and buy an actual head of lettuce rather than our packaged product?” While saving … Keep goin’