Three dream jobs

Takeaway: If my part-time career plans don’t work out, there are always other opportunities.

Three dream jobs I’ll never apply for unless I am hungry

Here are three of my favorites, so far.  Though each unique unto itself, the theme of these three could be called “getting in your business.”

 

Job #1: It’s all about the FIT

This job caught my eye. Until now, I’ve just guestimated my bra size. I had no idea there were people — paid people — out there to help me.

 

“The Bra Fitting Specialist is an expert in bra product and fit – able to diagnose fit issues, sell bra wardrobes and deliver emotionally engaging customer experiences that ultimately grow total bra sales. The Bra Fitting Specialist promotes an ‘I am Best at Bras’ culture by inspiring, supporting and mentoring peers.”

All this and meet my emotional needs?  Who knew that a potential job could make me a customer. FIT ME.

I *am* the best at bras

 

 

Job #2: Location, location, location

The job, in this case, looked fantastic.  Until I noticed the long subway commute.

 

Work Environment:

  • Office, computer
  • Rikers Island jail
  • Community organizations

 

Just kind of slipped that one in there, eh?

The Prison by Anonymous, courtesy of The Met

 

Job #3: Superheros only

Posted for a guitar school, this job, entitled “desk superstar,” sounded promising.  That is, until you leave the desk.

 

And yes, you must be able to clean a bathroom! If you cannot clean a toilet with enthusiasm, this is not the job for you!”

 

Oh yes, I can! But should I?

 

Of course many of us have no choice on whether or not we clean toilets — that’s not the point. The point is: WHY MUST I PRETEND TO LOVE IT?

 

Got some job descriptions to share? Ever think the tasks as described are only achievable by bionic humans? Share in the “comments” below.

 

PS: Thank you to Ruth Eckles for encouraging the sharing of these. Perhaps she’s trying to stop getting my “wtf?” forwards so that I post here instead. You know Eckles?  She’s running a mighty fine business called Tactile Productions. Need a story told? She’s your place.  Check it out.


Comments

Three dream jobs — 2 Comments

  1. Please send the photo of you enthusiastically cleaning the toilet to the job posting! Please!!!! Thanks for the mention, Vlachos!

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